Floyd reference and a want for people that nick stuff

Last December I had a "momentary lapse of reason". Actually, it was more like a brain fart, but I just wanted to get a Pink Floyd reference in there and "momentary lapse of reason" just sounds so much more poetic.

The moment in question involved pens. I got a call from a company that make promotional products and they were offering this great deal on promo pens. Now, normally I would just hang up on such calls since pens just aren't really anything that I would be interested in and don't really "go" with massage therapy. Sure, clients write checks and they fill in client intake forms, but since it's not a "writey" intensive business, pens just don't seem like the most obvious promo product.
But the guy on the phone was so over-the-top in the sales pitch, SO OVER THE TOP that he made me laugh. It was like I was in a Saturday Night Live skit. So what happened? I ended up getting the pens. LOTS of pens with my massage business info on them. This was a lapse of reason on my part.

These may be like no other pens. I think they reproduce. No matter how many I give away, there always seems to be more. The box in which the pens live is like the biblical sack of fishes and loaves. I have a mission to get these pens out there......

I give the pens to clients. I "sneak" them on to counters at banks and grocery stores, hoping that the person behind me "nicks" pens (FYI "to nick" in British slang is "to steal" for those who haven't seen any Guy Richie movies or those terrible sitcoms from the 70's).
I throw them into the wee pen bucket of anyone that I come across that has one - my hairdresser, the guys at the post office. I have a stash of pens in my bag at all times - putting them here, putting them there, putting them everywhere.

So....if you happen to wake up and find that there are pens all over your house with the name of a massage therapy business on them. Never fear. It's only me paying a visit - the Santa Claus of pens.

Think I'll put another Floyd reference in here since they're shiney....

"No more turning away from the weak and the weary
No more turning away from the coldness inside
Just a world that we all must share
It's not enough just to stand and stare
Is it only a dream that there'll be no more turning away?"

From the Song "On The Turning Away", off the Album "A Momentary Lapse of Reason" by Pink Floyd

Gaelic lesson #15 "peann", pronounced "pan", meaning "pen"